Do all gay guys go through a stage of denial? I personally never did, but I wanted to know if this was something that all gay guys have gone through!


  1. “I watch gay porn, have never been attracted to women, and occasionally stare at guys. I’m still *totally* straight.”

    Apparently, I am not the only gay guy who did this.

  2. Some do yes. I didn’t go through denial, but I go through episodes to where I wish I wasn’t gay and feminine. Mainly because I’m black as well, and I’d rather be one or the other, and I would like friends and a boyfriend. I don’t know.

    I’m just learning to accept myself I guess.

  3. I was never in denial about my attraction to other guys. I knew I was gay as soon as I hit puberty. I was closeted for years because the consequences of me coming out would have been too severe and I may not have lived through them honestly.

    So while I denied my gayness to others, I never denied to myself. The latter is what I think of when someone says “denial”. The former I like to think of more as a necessary defense mechanism.

  4. I didn’t, no.

    While I showed clear signs of same-sex attraction in my youth (ages 7 to 10), I never acknowledged that I was gay even a few years later when I got off to… ahem, yaoi and eventually gay porn.

    I even thought to myself “but, I like guys, not girls” more often than once, sometimes after my unknowing dad would tell me about how I was going to get a wife and kids and yadda yadda.

    It was only when I was 16 and learned that one of my classmates from the sixth grade was gay, that I realized… Oh, I’m gay. As in, a homosexual.

    I never denied it, but I never fully realized it for a long time either, while also still being aware of it.

  5. I came out the day after I figured out I was gay… which was when I was 24. I figured I had wasted so much time not realizing the truth that when I did, I simply wanted to start the life I was meant to live. I also had my first sexual experience the weekend after I came out, so a pretty good week 🙂

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